Is this what I really want to do?
by carrielynn4638
Summary: Erin starts to wonder if Jay is the person she want's to spend her life with. When she determines he is, she finds out some interesting news that she wants to share with him. But not before he asks her one very important question involving a little black box.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

-Set as the season 4 finale-

Erin's point of view

As I sit at my desk looking across at my partner I wonder if I'm really the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with, marry and have kids with, just a year ago I was having a relapse and wasn't talking with him. But then I think back to all the times and special moments we have shared together, and I remember our "One Day" promise and think back to what I was feeling in that moment and it easily calms all of my doubts about our relationship. He loves me and I love him.

Jay's point of view

I was making myself busy finishing all of the paperwork from the case we just solved. I was trying to get out of the office as quick as possible I had plans to take Erin to a nice restaurant to take her mind off of work. Lately, she's seemed out of it all. I just want to take her out to a nice meal to calm her down, as much as I can before I propose to her. I know that Erin really isn't the type of person who can she herself settling down with someone and starting as family. But I think I can convince her to marry me. Hopefully…..

Erin's point of view

I just finished all of my paperwork and It is 5:00 our normal quiting time on slow days. All the guys are still finishing theirs. Jay told me today before we left the apartment he had special plans to take me out tonight. I have been so happy lately with Jay. She was glad that finally told Jay what she had been wanting to tell him for a while, well part of it anyways.

FLASHBACK

It was a normal Tuesday night, they had gotten off of work at 8. She went home to start cleaning the apartment and he went to pick up some take-out. She had just finished placing all the pillows on their bed when she heard Jay come in the apartment. She went into the Kitchen to help him get all the food out. He had went to the Purple Pig, her favorite, He quickly passed her hamburger and fries to her. While she went and grabbed them some beers. They both went and sit on the couch. They turned on the tv to some re-run of Grey's Anatomy. The made small talk about the case and their day. They are sitting beside each other on the couch they had just finished cleaning up from their supper. Jay was sitting on the end of the couch and Erin was sitting beside him with her head resting on his shoulder, with her hand on intertwined with his. She hadn't said anything but today's case had took a great toll on Erin. It was about a kid they had found earlier today after her father had killed her mother because she was having an affair, he then committed suicide. Normally these cases were hard but she was really being hard on her self. Lately she had been thinking about her future and what she saw with the rest of her life. She had been contemplating having kids. She knew when she was young she wanted kids but wondered if she would be a good mom, considering she had Bunny for a mom, but after thinking over it she had decided she wanted to have kids. But she didn't just want to have kids she wanted to have Jay's kids. As she was sitting there she decided that she should tell Jay what she had been thinking about. So while Jay was turning down the bed for the evening she was in the bathroom removing her make-up and brushing her teeth. She was thinking about telling Jay about the decision she had made and to see if he agreed with her. So she finished brushing her teeth and got into bed and waited on Jay to finish getting ready for bed himself. Once he got into bed he went to turn the nightstand lamp off and she stopped him. He was worried he had noticed she had been off a little today but knew that she would say what was on her mind. She has started opening up to Jay more than anyone else even Hank. " I wanted to talk to you about something that I've been thinking about lately and see if you agree with the decision I've come too." Now he was really worried. "What's up Babe?" he said. "Well seeing that little girl today who now has no parents, I've been thinking about kids myself." He was happy he had always wanted kids but he didn't know what Erin wanted he knew he could get her to open up but he was afraid that he would get an answer that he didn't want to hear. "And… what have you been thinking?" he asked. "When I was little I always wanted to have children but I was afraid that I would be a bad mom like Bunny.." Jay cuts her off and says "Of course you wouldn't you are nothing life Bunny you would be a great mother, any child would be lucky to have you as a mother. I would be lucky to have you as the mother to my children and would hope that one day you will be, because I would be the happiest man in this world" By this time Erin was crying "I can't believe you feel this way because I had decided that I feel the exact same way. I am so glad that we are on the same page. Erin leans over and kisses Jay. So what do you say we start practicing tonight?" He said. "You know what that sounds great."

END OF FLASHBACK

She got home and started getting ready to go to dinner with Jay and was putting the final touches of her make-up, when Jay walked into the apartment. He come into the bathroom and kissed her and asked "Are you ready?" "Almost she replied." She put on her dress and shoes and they were out the door. While the drove to the restaurant Erin asked him "So you remember a while back when you said you wanted to have kids?" "Yes, I do why?" Jay replied. "I was wondering when you were thinking we should actually start trying?" Erin said. "Well I don't know, I had always envisioned being married before I had kids. But if we got pregnant before we got married I would still be just as happy!" Jay said.

Good Erin thought because she had something she needed to tell him.

Inside the restaurant

They had been in the restaurant about 45 minutes and they were just starting on desert. They were having a great evening. Jay had this planned for weeks ever since he had went and asked Voight for permission.

FLASHBACK

It was a normal day in intelligence and they were ending the day. Everyone was packing up after finishing their paperwork. "Hey I'm gonna go and grab some food and take it home see you there?" Erin said. "Yeah I'll see you at home babe." Jay said and he kissed her bye. After Erin left Jay went and knocked on Voights office door.

"Come in Halstead, what do you need?"

"I wanted to talk to you about something."

"You want to propose to Erin?"

"How'd you know?"

"I've seen your relationship progress these past two years, I keep comparing your relationship to mine and my wife's. I could tell you love her and would do anything for her. I remember when I felt like that about Camille and that was when I knew this was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. So just say it was instincts."

To say Jay was stunned was an understatement.

"Well thank you so much Sir!" Jay said

"Your welcome son and Jay it's after work you don't have to call me Sir."

END OF FLASHBACK

Jay had told the waiter he wanted him to bring out coffee with their desserts, Erin always drinks coffee with her dessert. He went and got a special cup that had "Will you marry me?" Engraved in the bottom. So when dessert came around he instantly got really nervous. They were finishing their coffee and Jay took his last sip and to push Erin to look at the bottom of his cup he said "Yuck the bottom of my cup is full of coffee grinds, is yours?"

"I'm not to the bottom yet hold on."

She starts to drink a little faster after what Jay said. She got to the bottom of her cup and said "No but wait, there's something wrote on the bottom. It says will you marry me..." She was so shocked that she almost dropped her mug. She looks at Jay and asks "Did you do this?"

Jay didn't say anything he just got down on one knee. Took out a black little box and took her hand and said

"Erin you make me the happiest man on earth. I can't imagine living without you, and I don't want too. I can remember when I first joined intelligence and it was right after we can back from Jules funeral and Hank was talking with us down stairs in the garage. He was talking about how the people you are standing next to are your family. All I could think about was how beautiful you are and how I could imagine starting my own family with you. It was that moment that I knew I was in love with you and would be forever. Erin it would make me the happiest man in the world if I could make you my wife. So Erin, will you marry me?"

Erin had tears rolling down her cheeks and immediately she said "Yes of course I will!"

So they kissed and Jay took the ring and put it on Erin's ring finger "I can't believe you planned this and I had no clue at all that you were going to do this! I love you so much and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life together with you."

Erin said. "But there's something I've been meaning to tell you."

"What is it babe?" Jay asked.

"You remember a couple of months ago when I asked you when you about having kids?"

"Yes I do why?"

"Well I hope now is a good time because I'm pregnant!" Erin said

"Baby! I can't believe this I'm so happy!" Jay said excitedly

" I know you would be excited I am so happy and can't wait to start my life with you Jay Halstead!"

"Me either!" Jay said!

END OF CHAPTER


	2. Chapter 2

I know it's been a while but I'm back with another chapter! Hope you guys enjoy! Please Review!

Chapter 2

Set in Erin and Jay's apartment

They had just returned from the doctors office. Erin had an appointment with her OB/GYN early that morning. "I can't believe that I'm already 12 weeks! It seems like yesterday I had just told you!" Erin said. "I know! It's been 5 weeks since we got engaged and you told me that your were pregnant. But I have one thing I want to talk to you about." Jay said. Erin knew what he was talking about he wanted her to tell the unit and more importantly Voight. She hadn't told anyone else about her pregnancy and he was worried that she would get hurt in a bust and lose the baby. "I know you don't want to go on desk duty. But you have to think of the baby. It makes you mad you can't do your job I understand that but would you rather lose the baby?" Jay asked. "Are you implying that I want to lose the baby Jay? Really?" Erin answered quickly. "No babe of course not I know you would never put our baby in harms way but you need to put your self aside for this one time and think of our child!" Jay replied. "I guess your right. I didn't want to tell anyone till I was 13 weeks. But it's only a week away so I guess we can go ahead and tell Voight and the unit." Erin said. "Thank you baby I know that this was hard for you, cause you love your job, but I would hate to see something happen to you or the baby. I'm only trying to protect you guys" Jay says walking up to her and resting his hand on the swell of her stomach and leaning down to capture her lips in a kiss. "So we go back to work in Monday let's tell Voight first then we can tell the rest of the team." Erin said "so I guess it will be desk duty for me..." Erin added sadly. "You know I love you so much for what you have done for our babies already and their not even here yet." Jay said. "Thank you babe I just can't wait for the babies to finally be here!" Erin replied.

In the bullpen the next morning

Jay and Erin arrived to work earlier than usual so they could talk to Hank before everyone got to work. They both walked into his office and immediately Voight knew they wanted to talk with them about something important. "Hey we were wondering if we could talk to you about something?" Erin said with Jay at her side. "Sure, what's up?" He asked "Well as you know a little over a month ago we got engaged, right? Well at the same time I found out I was pregnant. I told Jay but I wanted to wait till the end of my first trimester before I told you or anyone else in the unit. Because I was afraid of being put on desk duty. But I'm twelve weeks now so Jay convinced me I should tell you. So when does my desk duty start?" Erin said. Voight was still trying to wrap his head around the thought of Erin having Jays baby. He replied "Wow first congratulations you guys! I will want you to start desk duty right away to keep both of you safe." "I understand" Erin said. "But we have one more surprise for you." Jay said. They both looked at each other smiling and looked back at Voight and said together "We're having twins!"

Erin and Jay had decided they wanted to tell the team in a different way so they had planned on going and getting a cake made with a picture of the babies on the top with the sonogram picture and written across the top "Halstead Twins coming soon!"

So on their lunch break Jay went to pick up "food" and the cake also. Erin was sitting very nervously at her desk, she was worried that the team wouldn't approve of them being pregnant before they were even married!

Jay had just returned with the food and had left the cake down stairs, so no one would see it.

While the unit was finishing up their lunch and getting ready to start back to work. Jay and Erin both stood up at the same time and walked down stairs to grab the cake. When they returned the unit already noticed that something was up with the both of them. Jay sit the cake down on Erin's desk. "So, I assume you guys have noticed that Jay and I have been acting weird lately and we figured that we owed you guys an explanation." We couldn't decide how to tell you guys so we thought food would be the best way since everyone loves to eat" everyone staring at Ruzek. Erin turned the box to face the unit and slowly opened the box to reveal the cake which was blue and pink all around and in the middle was the picture of the Halstead Twins and the writing across the top. Burgess immediately started screaming. Atwater and Ruzek went and grabbed Jay excitedly. Everyone circled around the couple and told the congratulations. Everyone was happy for the young couple.


End file.
